Monday, January 25, 2010

Fun with dictionaries or "Father, why do these words sound so nasty?"

Wow. A California school pulled a dictionary from its curriculum. A dictionary. Why? Because some biddy working as a volunteer found that the dictionary contained a definition for.... oral sex.

Goodness me! Those dictionaries, defining things with no regard for morality! Egads!

Ridiculous as this story is, it brought back some fine nostalgia for me. I was 11 when my parentals took me to see the movie Hair. Yes, Hair. With drugs and nudity and everything! (I bet that biddy who got the dictionary yanked from her school would call CPS on my folks if this all hadn't happened 30 years ago.)

Anyway, during the song "Sodomy" there were some words I didn't understand*. I asked my Mom what was going on. "He's saying those words to shock the girls," she said. Yes, I asked, but what do those words mean? "I'll tell you later."

Well, I knew that "I'll tell you later" was code for "I am not going to tell you". Damn the luck. Nevertheless, intrepid me consulted a dictionary when I got home to find out just what those words meant.

Bear in mind that I was 11 and this was a more innocent time. I found the words all right, but my reactions were either "I still don't get it" or "EEEWWWWW! Why would anyone want to do THAT??!!"

*For the record, the words are: sodomy, fellatio, cunnilingus, pederasty, and masturbation. There, I said them and I'm glad, GLAD do you hear me! Of course, this post now cannot be read in certain California schools, but so be it. I live on the edge, me.


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